After a summer of angst, big revelations and a few surprises, it seems a time for respite is at hand.
It’s been approximately eight weeks since my life took a sharp left, then a right; a swerve over a huge pot hole and the loss of a few precious items. I’ve gotten over the initial shock. I’ve accepted that I’ve been delt one of “Life’s Unfair” cards-(it is sitting in a frame on a shelf next to some of my most epic regrets). And now I’m left to plan my next steps.
‘It Is What It Is’ …my mind keeps on loop. Deep cleansing breaths. Relax the shoulders. A prayer for strength and guidance follows. I am in control of me. Of only me. But I am in control. Life is happening FOR me. A time to be vigilant and to accept the ‘signs’ all around me. A time to remember that I am loved and celebrated by God Himself (a lot of small victories of course. I’m sure God is shaking His head most times when He checks in on me). But loved nonetheless.
All platitudes a plenty, I am a flawed human being. My parents are flawed, their parents were flawed, America is a stolen nation, Cain killed Abel and Adam blamed Eve. Mankind is quirky, fragile, loving, cruel, fierce, loyal, confused, dumbfounded and inspiring. I can become quite amazed at how we all navigate around one another. But here we are and here I am. Waking up each morning and deciding to be a good human or not. Pretty simple. Right? Flawed and Hopeful. So where do I go from here?
Photo by UltimatelyM ~Town Lake Austin, TX
My life, as I type these thoughts today, is literally a blank page. I have two grown children who are living their own lives. My job keeps me comfortable but humble. I want for nothing from a material standpoint. Water, light, gas, groceries, a backyard and a couple three cats. I am learning guitar, a little piano and a harmonica is on its way. I have been intentionally single my entire adult life and therefor have no obligation to anyone else but me. I am older now but I know that the mind is powerful. I have seen humans do amazing things at almost any age-if they put in the work. I would be crazy to blow this second chance at building something fresh and new for myself.
I have some ideas. 🙂